Ask, and it shall be given unto you.
When I first went witnessing, my heart was so rotten. I was definitely self-righteous. I think I went into it thinking that this was the ultimate level of “holy.”
I was trying to do all these works to feel worthy of God’s love, but this was my own pride. That night, God humbled me so much. I came across a video on youtube of a cover of “Seek Ye First” (link below). There’s lyrics that says “Ask, and it shall be given unto you.
Seek, and you shall find. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” This made all of my rottenness come into light. God should’ve been the only one that I depended on and had trust in, but I tried to do it with my own works and strength. All I had to do was ask, seek, and knock for God to give me the Spirit to have the wisdom and strength and to trust in the LORD.
We are smaller than ants to God. He doesn't need us to grow His kingdom. Honestly, He would be so much more efficient and effective if He didn't use us. But he does invite us and He definitely commands us to spread the gospel (yes, THE Matthew 28:18-20). But He doesn't want us to do so with a burdensome heart or a heart that glorifies works. I started witnessing with the wrong heart, and even now I am continuously praying for my rotten and prideful heart. And when I feel my pride slowly crawling up, I think of this song and Matthew 7:7-11 and find comfort in the fact that when I seek God and the Spirit, God is such a faithful and loving father that he is slowly purifying my heart and humbling me every day.